Love Yourself in Order to Receive Love

What is the one thing that everyone on this planet craves…?  Love!  So often people search outside themselves for this love and end up still feeling empty and alone.  Until we can truly, unconditionally love ourselves, we paradoxically, will serve as a block to allowing love in.  We are actually standing in our own way of receiving the love we so desperately crave.  On some level we feel undeserving of such love and that makes it hard to recognize once it presents itself.  In this, I am not necessarily speaking of romantic love.  I am speaking of the gentle words, loving deeds and acts of kindness from others that we may be overlooking daily because deep inside we are loathing self.  We unconsciously cannot see our own beauty and wonder so we honestly don’t believe that anyone else can.

Have you ever received a compliment and thought (or even said out loud), “Nah, they don’t really mean that. There must be a hidden motive behind their words.”?  The shadow behind those thoughts is this: somewhere inside you don’t truly believe that you are worthy of such praise (love).  So you continue to block the love that is coming to you and your quest for love only perpetuates.  No matter what anyone says to you, you still cannot accept the love and are left feeling forever empty.  How does one move past this endless cycle of pain you wonder?

First, we must become highly aware of our self-talk.  The dialogue we have with ourselves can make or break our day and our self-esteem.  Anything that is other than kind and gentle we must toss out!  It’s perfectly fine (and encouraged) to recognize a mistake, but to dwell in it only perpetuates a negative feeling about self.  Allow yourself to be human and fallible.  Forgive yourself for your mistakes easily and give yourself the grace that God/Spirit/Source gives to us every day, all day.  Begin your day recognizing something kind, gentle or loving that you did and honor yourself for the love that you are.  Be willing to literally pat yourself on the back or speak a “Yay me!” when you complete a task or do something nice.  This may sound trite or just too easy because... it is that easy!  However, it does take a committed effort to dig yourself out of this cycle.  No one can do this for you. You can choose to be your own worst enemy or your very best friend.

None of us are an accident.  We are all here on purpose and each one of us holds valuable gifts to share with this world.  This is undisputable. No one person is more deserving than another. We are all derived from the same essence of love (God) and have built in specialties that set us apart from others. Look inside (and continue this always) for the beauty of you.  When you finally love and cherish the wonder of you, you will be open to the bounty of love that has always been there.  You will begin to resonate at a higher energy level and additionally, you will begin to attract even more love into your life!

With love,

Kristen Brown

www.sweetempowerment.com

How to Handle a Tough Day

A Tough Day

Everything is going alright then all at once, Bam!  We feel sad, down or depressed,  perhaps even disappointed or angry.  These feelings are incredibly uncomfortable and we squirm in our seats trying to get them off of us!  But they are lingering… sticking… and it feels so gross.  What to do? How do we stop this downward spiral?

There is so much information about this topic out in the world today.  People will throw everything at us from take a pill- to you just need to get out more- to you’re just being a baby! What I will say is if we are truly honest with ourselves, we all have these moments on some level or another.  The good news is, there are things we can do to move through them with grace and come out the other side smiling again.

1. Vent it out-  Share your feelings.  Dig deep into your inner being and uncover the thought or belief that is initiating these unwanted emotions.  There is always a thought behind any emotion.  Always…  Be willing to dig that sucker up, look at it and feel it fully for what it is.  And then be willing to release it.  You have now released the pressure building inside, become aware of the troubling thought or belief and since you’ve uncapped the blinding, overpowering emotion of it, you are better able to turn the thought around and find your way back to productivity again.
2. Cry-  Crying is a natural pressure release valve that we are beautifully designed with.  Who doesn’t feel better after a good cry?  The hormones released during a good cry serve us perfectly.  Don’t be afraid of what others will think,  let ‘er rip!  Again, this is a great way to clear out the building pressure so you may see the situation, thought or belief clearly and plan a forward movement whether it be merely a change in perception around a situation or an actual action plan.
3. Be gentle with yourself-  No matter what topic I am writing about or speaking about, I always mention this.  Being gentle with ourselves is most imperative in moving forward in our lives with a healthy self-esteem.  And a healthy self-esteem helps us to make better decisions and plan clearly for our futures!  Allow yourself the “off” day.  They happen.  Sometimes we can stop them and sometimes we can’t.  You are human and you are in process.  It’s ok to have a step back while on your path forward.  To judge yourself, is only to put negativity where you are growing.
4. Don’t overdue it-  Allow yourself this time to express, but do not stay stuck in it.  Staying stuck in anything for too long is to become stale and worn.  We will become stagnant and our negativity will usually progress!  This is where our courage comes in and it’s the time for a little self-talk,  “Ok, I had a very bad moment, but now I am putting a smile on my face and jumping right back into the game!  I will succeed!  I got this!  I am strong and I will persevere.”
5. Be grateful- No matter what, we all have something to be grateful for.  In low moments, grasping hold of those wonderful things in our lives lifts us up!  It shows us that all is not lost.  This might not be where I’d like to be, but for now, I have this and this and this!  Celebrate the wonders your life does have and remember, when we focus on the positive in our life, our energy shifts and we attract more positive to us.

In conclusion, allow yourself an “off” day but do the work it takes to move through it.  You are ok.  You are human and you will get through this but you are the only person who can make this happen!  Many Blessings Always!  Kristen Brown